iZOMBIE - Rob Thomas

Rob Thomas' fingerprint is all over iZOMBIE: a dark and witty sense of humour, young characters, the CW, the quirky detective who works outside of the law, the nostalgia for an ex-lover, the bad boy, the comic relief best friend, and the slightly-crooked accomplice. All of these characters are present in Veronica Mars, and their reflections echo in iZOMBIE. This isn't a bad thing, per se. Rob Thomas' voice is a lovely one, reminiscent of  a more diverse Joss Whedon (this comparison is furthered by the supernatural elements in iZOMBIE).

But at the same time, this authorial voice steamrolled the creative and compelling mythology of the original iZombie comic. While I'm glad to welcome Rob Thomas back to our television screens, it's a shame that Gwen Dylan, Ellie Stuart and Scott (or even that weird President gang) will never see the light of day. Though the comic was rushed, improperly paced, it was some kind of beautiful in its "throw everything to the wall" approach and I think Thomas could have done it some kind of justice.

Still, I didn't mean to be so down on iZOMBIE. If it wasn't for its alleged similarity to iZombie, I'd probably be in love with it; everything about it I should love. The tightly-structured murder mysteries, an overarching arc with brain-of-the-weeks, the wit. I just can't get past the what-could-have-been for long periods.

I still love it though.

Rating: five stars out of six (extremely good--one star off, just for bulldozing the source material)

Does the Wizarding World have a culture?

Rereading Harry Potter (okay, reading fanfics, you caught me), I noticed that the arts and humanities were near-completely ignored in the Hogwarts curriculum. Magic (DADA, charms, transfiguration, etc.) seems to be close to some sort of science, perhaps a fifth discipline of it (chemistry, physics, biology, geology and magic sounds pretty good). Then there are obviously some forms of magic that fall into other parts of science--potions sounds pretty similar to chemistry, herbology seems like a form of biology, and astronomy is pretty obviously physics.

There are only two first-year classes that are not to do with performing magic: flying--like some sort of physical education--and history--though it is Wizarding World-focused. There seems to be no literature, no art, no music (apart from an extracurricular "Toad Choir"). We are told of fairy tales by Beedle the Bard, and Rowling even wrote them. However, what good are these if they are the only literature available? The wonder of fairy tales is that they can be built upon, not that they are complex works of art at their core (Rowling should understand--every Beedle story is based on a real folk tale).

It's easy to get carried away when writing of magic. But what use is magic when there's nothing to support you?

Analysis of Detail from Guernica by Pablo Picasso

A Week of Stories - 21/06/2015

The Wetsuitman - Dagbladet (Monday)

On February 5, Kripos sent out a so called “Black Notice” through Interpol. It contains a DNA profile and a detailed description of the finding of the body on Lista. They received an answer the next day. 

The Lista body is not the only one that drifted ashore in a grey and black Triboard wetsuit.

That One Time My Brother And I Caused A Race Riot - Culture Club (Tuesday)

At a certain point, I began to believe that because we were in this hyper-exposed era of pro wrestling that all of this really ugly racial behavior was actually leading somewhere great, to a place where we were exorcising centuries-old demons about America’s terrible racial past. I was so wrong.

Why I Answered My Dad's Gay Sex Ad -  Narratively (Tuesday)

It was the mid-‘90s and the Internet was still something you had to access with dial-up and a shrink-wrapped CD from AOL. Any time I’d walk in while he was on the computer he’d immediately turn to face me. 

“Hey there,” he’d say, “how was school?”

I could hear the telltale sound of the mouse clicking to minimize a screen.

Dad had a secret.

5 Weird Realities When Scientologists Run Your School - Cracked (Wednesday)

Catholic school announces itself right there in the title -- if you go to Catholic school and you're surprised by the "Catholic" part of it, you probably really need more of the "school" part. But Scientology schools? Not so much. Renaissance Academy and Mary's School House and Greenfields -- nice names, huh? You'll have to do some research to discover they're affiliated with Scientology, though. At the Delphian School, where I went, you have to dig down about three pages into the "About Us" section of its website before the name L. Ron Hubbard is mentioned at all, and then only as a "philosopher" and "educator."

Take Down the Confederate Flag - The Atlantic (Thursday)

The Confederate flag’s defenders often claim it represents “heritage not hate.” I agree—the heritage of White Supremacy was not so much birthed by hate as by the impulse toward plunder. Dylann Roof plundered nine different bodies last night, plundered nine different families of an original member, plundered nine different communities of a singular member. An entire people are poorer for his action. The flag that Roof embraced, which many South Carolinians embrace, does not stand in opposition to this act—it endorses it.

 Disposable Cups, Forming A Permanent Legacy - News-Leader (Friday)

A continuous broad teal brushstroke, topped with a finer purple one. If that doesn't ring a bell, imagine it on disposable cups. Over the past couple decades, the pattern has been mass produced on millions of them, in addition to other products. 

The design is called "Jazz," and it has an oddly passionate fan base. You can buy it on T-shirts. It's been spotted on cars. It has a few thousand fans on Facebook.

 Clear Victory: A Deep Dive Into The World’s Most Prestigious Water-Tasting Competition - Buzzfeed (Friday)

We’d been instructed not to react to the water so as not to sway our neighbors’ opinions. We weren’t supposed to look at one another’s forms, either. For the sake of keeping our senses clear, we were to avoid wearing perfumes and colognes

I Made A Linguistics Professor Listen To A Blink-182 Song And Analyze The Accent - Atlas Obscura (Saturday) 

Two decades have passed since pop-punk exploded in the American music scene, yet the quintessentially suburban, teen-centric music still seems to bounce around our collective skulls. Of all the elements of the Clinton-era mutation of punk music that embraced skate and surf culture, mild angst, goofiness, and incredibly hooky, catchy music, it's the vocals that we remember. The very specific accent used in the mega-hits of the genre seems to still have a hold over anyone who was a teenager between 1993 and 2003: On Twitter you’ll see jokes made about the “pop punk voice" used by bands like the Offspring, New Found Glory, Avril Lavigne, and, especially, Blink-182. Their accents are a relic as strong as the Valley Girl voice.

This Woman Led the Latin Kings and Lived 'Orange Is the New Black' - VICE (Saturday)

The women are in a very vulnerable position when they're incarcerated, and some COs are predators. They seek these women out for sexual relationships. I've also seen women who use the guards' sexual predatory nature to get out of prison. But the majority of the time, the women feel that it's going to make them feel like they're not in prison—on the other hand, it's forced. It's not really consensual.

Rescuing Wonderful Shivery Tales - The New York Times (Sunday)

This collection contains many of the most-loved fairy tales in the history of the form: “Little Snow White” (Sneewittchen), with its haunting refrain (“Mirror, mirror…”) and its three steps to deathly unconsciousness (first the stay-laces, then the poisoned comb, then the irresistible red red apple); the Grimms’ chilling and ferocious variant of “Cinderella” in which her sisters cut off their toes and their heels to fit into the glass slipper; “Rapunzel”; “The Robber Bridegroom”; “Fitcher’s Bird”—one could go on and on. The book is a classic, formed like a mosaic of precious small pieces, each one glinting with its own color and character, glassy and crystalline, but somehow hard, unyielding.

And yet much of it is unfamiliar.

Mothers Are OITNB

The first episode of the third season of Orange is the New Black is called "Mother's Day". Not only does it work as a description of the episode, it is a summation of the series' major themes: the inner lives of women. Traditionally, women are defined by their maternal instincts. A woman is either Medea or the virgin Mary. Orange... takes that trope, plays off it, and subverts it.

Inappropriate Kids' Cartoons Adaptations

Source

Most people probably know by now that the only similarities the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles comic has with the eventual franchise is the character names and the concept. This got me think about what would happen if I applied the concept to a few other unsuitable sources.

My Little Cthulhu

My Little Cthulhu is a touching tale set in the eldritch city of R'yleh. The major characters of My Little Cthulhu has the Deep One Cthulhu and his five friends, fellow Deep One Dagon, the Avatars Hastur and Nyarlathotep, and the Outer Gods Shub-Nigurath and Tsathoggua.

The series will be constructed for five seasons. Of course, the first few seasons will be simple enough, though they will become more unknowable during the course of the series (with the exception of Nyarlathotep, who will grow more knowable). Finally, the series closes with the sinking of R'yleh, and the sextet splits up to save their world from humanity. 

Loony Thrones

Loony Thrones is a slapstick anthology based in the slapstick world of Westeros.

There are three regular segments and countless recurring:

1. The struggle for power in the centre of Westeros. The fighters in this region utilise weapons like anvils and mallets. 
2. The border of Westeros. The humans constantly have their plans backfire onto them!
3. The laboratory of Essos. Two dragons live there, and they try to take over the world. Eventually a girl named Dany joins the cast, but we don't talk about those years. 

The Toxic Crusaders

"Toxic Crusaders is an animated series based on The Toxic Avenger films. It features Toxie, the lead character of the films leading a trio of misfit superheroes who combat pollution."

-Wikipedia

Yes. This was a real thing. It really can't get any worse, so I will leave you with that. 

An Update On Charlie Hebdo

I actually managed to pick up an issue of Charlie Hebdo a few months back (early April). It was blathering on about "les terroristes Islamique" (seemingly every other cartoon was about Muslims). Though this urge is understandable, they seem to have forgotten that one of the three police officers who died in the Charlie Hebdo was a Muslim.

Since I last reported on it, Charlie Hebdo has received a PEN award. This is an implicit approval of its incredibly racist content. There is no way around it: Charlie Hebdo is a racist publication, and it has been approved by the biggest cartooning awards.

And again, France is not the bastion of free speech it was painted as after the Hebdo attacks.

Related:

• In the Mideast, as in France, satire is a weapon against extremists
• No, we’re not all Charlie Hebdo, nor should we be
• Why Charlie Hebdo attack is not about Islam
• This Attack Was Nothing To Do With Free Speech — It Was About War
• Why I'm Protesting PEN's Award For Charlie Hebdo
• Everything the Hooded Utilitarian wrote on Hebdo
• The Aesthetic Failure of 'Charlie Hebdo'